Special Entry

"I thought I could describe a state; make a map of sorrow. Sorrow, however, turns out to be not a state but a process."

This is in the very beginning of the last chapter of The Grief Observed by C.S Lewis. The Grief Observed is a compilation of C.S Lewis' journals and writings as he grieved the loss of his beloved wife. C.S Lewis is a renown theologian and a trained thinker. He wrote scores of books, fiction and non-fiction, detailing all aspects of life, God, thought and love. The Grief Observed was one of his last books and I believe truly summarized this incredible man of faith and the life he lived for the Lord. He expressed deep emotion and journaled throughout all his stages of grief, anger, doubt and redemption. For an apologetic and hero of the Christian faith, it is amazing to me how vulnerable he let himself be in his book. His honesty, intellect and faith is why I love his writing and I believe The Grief Observed was C.S Lewis' mind at it's best and worst.

The Grief Observed has, like all art, nearly endless meanings. Three major themes of the writing are grief, love and faith. "No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear" Lewis writes. After the loss of his wife, whom he refers to as H, C.S Lewis felt anger and confusion. He asked the same questions we all ask at some point. Mainly, why? In all his other writing he has always been a man to have known the answers and he was always quick to attack any logical flaw, but when he found himself in the midst of fear and grief he began to doubt. When he sought God he felt like God had “shut the door and locked the bolts.” Meaning he knew God was there, but he couldn't hear God, he could no longer trust the Lord.

He has such a unique mind and I believe only C.S Lewis himself could critique his thoughts so well. This sets the mood for the entire chapter. A chapter of reflection, honesty, and an overwhelming feeling of joy and peace. This chapter brings a solid conclusion to the book, and C.S Lewis' journey of grief. He leaves the reader feeling completed knowing God is in control. And he goes back to sort out the mess he made of the readers mind. (All the theological questions, all the doubts, all the fears and uncertainty.)

"The notes have been about myself, and about H., and about God. In that order. The order and the proportions exactly what they ought not to have been."

For a man of Lewis' stature to admit he was off base is revolutionary. His wisdom and humility is overwhelming. This is one of my favorite quotes from the book. I'm not sure why. I guess it's just great to read this after three chapters of alot of hopelessness.

"Thus up from the garden to the Gardener, from the sword to the Smith. To the life-giving Life and the Beauty that makes beautiful."

Much like the quote above this takes the attention of C.S Lewis, H. and the awkwardness and puts the focus back on God. The quote just makes me smile. This is was a great read.


His mind and clarity of thought makes me wish I knew myself better. C.S Lewis is one smart cookie and A Grief Observed is one great read.






C.S Lewis

C.S Lewis has been one of my favorite authors since I began reading. His writing encountered me at a crucial time in my life and God used them in a big way. My first encounter with C.S Lewis was with the Chronicles of Narnia. I got my first detention in 6th grade and my dad handed me the 5 pound book and told me not to come out of my room until I read it all. After many hours of whining and a few minutes of reading I managed to find myself outside of those off-white walls. The talented author came back into my life a few years later. It was my senior year of high school and I was just finding who I was in the Lord when I began reading. When my father became a Christian he ordered a huge box of old books offline from a theology student long ago. The books contained nearly all of C.S Lewis writings. I started with Mere Christianity and was dumbfounded by every chapter. God spoke to me through his writing and taught me so much about thinking logically about the faith. I believe he was an author of infinite wisdom and I admire his passion for the Lord. I pick up Mere Christianity often and I am always lending it to friends trusting his writing will help them as much as it did me. His honesty, philosophy, testimony and thoughts forced me to admire his writing. I was influenced by ‘The Weight of Glory’ and a daily devotional with excerpts from all his writings. I have not read ‘A Grief Observed’ but I am anxious to get started. I am a bit familiar with the story behind the book and I am fascinated by circumstances surrounding his marriage.

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AFI

Assisted Living

the boys next door

The Boys Next Door is an interesting play. So far I have only read Act 1 but I am a bit skeptical of the play. It seems humor seems very awkward to me. I have never been a big fan of drama or skits. As I read the script I can see the play being acted out in my mind. So far, the play has been about several people who are mentally retarded and several people, mainly one man, who takes care of them. The patients, the ones who are diagnosed as mentally ill, do awkward things that normal people wouldn’t because of their condition. The patient’s acts are the main emphasis of the humor in the play. While the caretaker complains of his job and shares the struggles of working with these people to the audience. I don’t really enjoy the play for several reasons. I don’t believe its right to laugh at the misfortunes of others, especially when they have not chosen that life for themselves. Of course they are going to do and say ‘off’ things because they cannot understand how to act otherwise. But is it right to laugh at them for it? Yes, we do laugh at friends and family and even strangers when they do funny things on accident, but do we always like being laughed at? Some might, others might not. Second, I feel as though the attempts at humor thus far have been far from funny. If the play was a serious play, attempting to raise awareness of the conditions of the many who are suffering from mental illness I could understand it and enjoy it more. But I feel like the play is just this weird balance between bad attempts at humor and even worse attempts are seriousness. I have not given up hope. Act II may bring more clarity to the play. Right now, it is my least favorite piece we have read in the class for the above reasons.

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Going to the Art museum on Friday was a thought provoking and exciting journey. As I walked around and appreciated the unique pieces of art I let my mind wonder. I wondered about the people who painted it, the story behind it, and the meaning of it (to name a few). All I saw at the art museum was the end piece. I didn’t see the making, or the finding. I didn’t see the heart of the artist, or circumstances surrounding the piece. All I saw was the piece. The culmination of hundreds of different happenings led up to this piece of art that I would stare at for a couple seconds and forget as soon as I walked away. Some pieces, I could tell, had more to them than others. Certain pieces had a lot more going on, it was obviously not just mindless colors, but a story. Like literature, each piece or art is such a small part of what it actually means. As literature and art relate to the person, what we see and read would be comparable to the outer self. The final piece of art is only what is presented to us, what makes the art real is what that piece means. What we read from literature and poems and what we hear from songs is only a part of the story. The true meaning goes much deeper than the words, or the painting. The true meaning not even the artist or poet knows. Art, literature and people are all endless. We can spend the rest of our lives exploring them in an attempt to fully know them, but we will be fruitless. I believe God created us to be infinite, to live our lives never truly knowing anyone, not even ourselves.

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I really enjoyed reading “Reading for Transformation through poetry of Gerard Manley Hopkins” by Francis X. McAloon. McAloon writes as a literary scholar and gives himself credibility through his writing by talking about his doctorate degree and pursuit for knowledge. I think what McAloon writes about in this article is largely what Professor Corrigan is trying to teach us through this class- Connecting literature and theology to provide a more holistic well rounded view of self and the world. McAloon and Corrigan’s thoughts and beliefs about literature and poetry are similar as portrayed in this article. I do agree with the points he made. I believe that “All truth is God’s truth” and I know God will be glorified in truth whether it’s done for His glory or not. I agree, we should read poems and other literature in deep meditation. We should take advantage of the lectio divina approach to understanding literature and scripture, as talked about in class and in this article. I enjoyed McAloon’s article for several reasons. Most importantly, he gives evidence for all the points he makes. He provides theological as well as literary sources that give everything he says credibility. I was able to enjoy it because everything was explained well. A lot of times scholars have very credible things to say, but it means nothing to me if I can’t understand it. Also, it was enjoyable because I agreed with all the points McAloon made. I am looking forward to changing the way I read literature, poems and Scripture. I am anxious to know myself better and achieve a more realistic worldview. I believe the Lord is glorified when we look for Him in everything. We can find His truth in everything we read or observe. Below is one of my favorite quotes from the article that I believe sums it up pretty well.

As texts for prayer, certain poems

invite us into liminal spaces of sacred encounter, where

God’s grace expands our awareness of the holy within

ourselves, our relationships, and our natural world.

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I’m really learning more about prayer lately and how it connects us with God and nature. Jesus is constantly going off alone to pray and spend time with His Father. Mark 14: 32-35 is the passage on the prayer at Gethsemane where Jesus prays with a passion that draws blood from His pours. Jesus is always going out to beautiful spots in nature to connect with God. We find him constantly withdrawing to mountain tops, gardens, seas. Jesus was withdrew to nature to connect with God through prayer. We should pray with a passion and a love for God that burns deep within us. Different from the Old, the New Testament focuses on the Holy Spirit’s intercession in prayer. Romans 8: 26 tells us “We do not know what to pray for, but the Spirit intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.” In 1 Corinthians 14 Paul talks about speaking in tongues and prayer language which is all led by the Spirit. We should pray in the Spirit always, whether that means in a prayer language or not. Jesus stressed the importance of prayer while he was on the earth and Paul reinforced His teachings. Jesus also correctly understood the practice of meditation. He was always fixated on the Word. I like that Professor Corrigan is teaching us the practice of silence and meditation. I believe it’s something our busy culture has forgotten. Jesus, being the author of our faith, led a perfect example of a life focused on God, a life focused on prayer.

We should learn how to pray and connect with nature like the leaders of our faith in the Bible. The Lord gave us the incredible gift of prayer and communication with Him. He loves us, and wants to spend time with us. He wants to speak to us and make us more like Him, this is accomplished through prayer. Pray unceasingly. Pray in the Spirit. Pray with passion. Live a lifestyle of prayer and worship, giving every moment to Him.

The soft wind blows across my face

For a moment life couldn’t be better

The sun is shining, but it’s not hot

All my worries slowly escape

The coconut fragrance from the

Suntan lotion still lingers on my skin

It makes me feel like nothings missing

When I know so much is

The lake is teaching me peace

While the birds are showing me grace

The wind is preaching love

While the clouds assure me of what’s coming

Nature is wrapping me in her arms

God is holding me close

How can I worry when I look around?

God is orchestrating it all…for me.

I went to Lake Bonny Park for this assignment, and I stayed there for at least 40 minutes. What a great time my small group of good friends and I had at lake Bonny. We went during our regular class time and it turned out to be perfect. There is not many times in the week where I can relax- really relax and enjoy silence. My dorm is so loud and my life is so busy I cherish moments of silence. The Lord speaks in silence, the Lord speaks through nature. Although I was with my friends as I was laying on the dock I felt as though it was just me. I looked up at the sky, the clouds were moving slowly, the birds spread their wings and moved so smoothly. I don’t know how to explain it but I know that the Lord created us for moments like that. When we do nothing but enjoy His creation and worship Him in adoration. It is hard not to give glory to God when you appreciate nature. We took note of the unique reptiles and insects crawling around, each unique, each with a purpose. It was weird to think that God is orchestrating all of it. God made that insect and knew it would crawl past me that day. He knew that I would think of him when it did and He knew He would get the glory. It’s all for Him. Something about the way God works, the methods in which He chooses to comfort us. His ways are far beyond us, and His thoughts are far greater than ours. We are left here only to gaze into the sky and scan the ocean in wonder, in amazement, in awe of our Creator. And best of all…He loves us. The Creator of the universe loves us.

Confirmation

Someone I loved once gave me

a box full of darkness

It took me years to understand

That this, too, was a gift

This is one of the most powerful, profound and well written poems I have ever read. (Not that I have read many poems). This is my favorite poem out of all that we have read this year. It is short and precise, profound and intimate. I think because right now I feel as though I am in a season of suffering this poem spoke to me on a much deeper level. I wonder if those who are not in the Lord can look back and appreciate their times of suffering. As Christians we have SO MUCH HOPE knowing that everything we go through is being worked out to our benefit, and to something much greater- that being the glory of God. We know through faith and through scripture that everything happens to use for a reason. We know we are never alone. On an intellectual note, nothing bad ever really happens to us. Nothing bad can happen to us because we are looked after and cared for by a loving sovereign God who is in COMPLETE control at all times. I think often times we choose suffering because of our inability to see the entire picture. We do not have the capacity to understand what the Lord is doing. Everything that happens to us is a gift from God, although most often we don’t see it that way. That is where faith plays in. When we cannot see, we believe. We hold-strong to the promises the Lord has made and know that all things work together for the good of those who love him. Someone once told me “Nothing ever happens to us and no one ever touches our lives without God’s permission, under His control and with our best interest in His mind.” How could I get through suffering without that knowledge? I couldn’t.

The Outer Self and the Inner Self

I really enjoyed last class’s discussion on
he inner self the outer self and the self in God. From what I understand, the outer self is what people see. It’s defines people’s views of you. The outer self is what you say, what you do, how you act. I think it’s a lot about your posture and it is what people see. The inner self is much more complicated. It is who we really are. The inner self consists of our thoughts, our core beliefs and values. The inner self infinite, consisting of never ending thoughts, emotions and feelings. I believe the inner self is endless. No one can ever fully know you (your inner self). I believe none of us will ever even fully know ourselves. That is kind of a scary thought but I believe it’s true. I prefer the “pie” model of this theory. I believe the “pie” model more accurately depicts the three layers of self because self in God is in the middle. The “iceberg” model depicts the ocean as self in God and that just doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. Who we are in God is by far the most important of the three levels of character. Which is odd because it is the smallest part in the pie model, while it’s the biggest part of the iceberg model. I don’t believe we will ever fully understand who we are in God on this side of life. Our inner self will always be scarred with pride. We will always view ourselves “through a mirror dimly” as Paul says. As we grow as Christians we refine our inner selves and therefore grow closer to becoming who we are in God. This will affect our outer selves and the way people view us, ultimately the way people view Christ, seeing that we represent him here on earth.

Writing (Short Stories)

Writing my short story was actually quite enjoyable. I have never written anything like that before. I had never written much of anything before. I thought it would be a lot of searching for the right word or phrase and then it would just sound like I tried too hard. It wasn’t that at all. It may still read like I tried too hard to be a good writer, because there is a very good chance I did. I am unaware of what writing style I am best at. So I just kind of went with my gut. I am happy with the way things worked out though. The character “Mike” was one that I really found myself enjoying. I loved developing his thoughts and emotions. I liked evolving his character to give the reader insight. I found myself with a perfect vision for the character. I knew exactly who I wanted him to be and I knew what he would do in the situations I put him in. I liked being in full control of the story. I could control all the characters, acts, thoughts and emotions. It was a really cool way to get across my personal beliefs and thoughts in a creative way that people could enjoy. Creative writing is definitely something I want to pursue. I think it’s something everyone should pursue. It’s a creative way to touch people lives, to move people. I like that. I think what Prof. Corrigan said in class was right, when we write and think we come to know ourselves better. By knowing ourselves better we can better our relationship with the Lord and with others. This is essential… as a matter of fact it’s the only thing that matters here on earth. Writing is of the utmost importance.

Mikey Mike

Life. Life is crazy, but especially for Michael Falls. Michael doesn’t want a lot from life, at least not that he knows of. He enjoys things that way. Although everyone has their own opinion of Michael he likes to think of himself as simple. Just simple.

Mike hadn’t been that happy to hear the bell ring since yesterday. His stuff was already packed, he didn’t have much. He enjoys sitting in his chair while everyone else leaves. Maybe he likes the conversations he hears, maybe he just wants to be different, maybe not, whatever it is Mike is never in a rush. Judy always sits next to Mike and it seems she doesn’t mind letting him borrow her pens. She got up before he did, of course, and walked out the door not saying anything to anyone, but smiled out of courtesy to Jimmy, the class clown. Jimmy would never stop talking, Mike enjoyed it sometimes. Harry and Stephanie walked out together talking about nothing that meant anything to anyone. Mike wondered how they have stayed together so long, he didn’t like them much. He couldn’t help but wonder if what they talked about even mattered to them. Mike feels uncomfortable talking about things too deep, but feels more awkward talking about things that mean nothing at all. Just as the lovely couple walked out Eddy came fumbling into Mike’s view. Eddy pointed a finger at Mike and winked like an overdramatic actor. Mike never knows what to do, so he just smiles, that’s what works best for him. Eddy was hilarious to Mike. They had met a couple times, but never hung out. It wasn’t that Mike thought he was too good for Eddy, it was just too hard to Mike to stop laughing at him. No one but Mike knows when it’s the right time for him to get out of his seat and head back home. Mike knew it was time, so he got up slowly and confidently with the same posture as always. Mr. Buckle was still erasing the board, Mike thought about helping but decided against it. Probably out of laziness, maybe something deeper. Mike isn’t necessarily an awkward guy, so he thought of something short to say to Mr. Buckle on his way out. Most people don’t understand Mike so he figures it’s the same story with Mr. Buckle even though he is smarter than most. Mike doesn’t have to reach deep into his pocket to grab his music player, he has had it in his hand all class. He plugs the headphones into his ears; he paid more for the ones that fit just right. Music was important to Mike. Maybe too important, so he figured the headphones would be a good investment. As he walked out and the door shut behind him he passed Sam. Sam was the new kid who thought he was great. Mike knew better. Mike couldn’t play guitar very well, but he knew Sam wasn’t as good at it as everyone thought he was. Actually, there isn’t much Mike can do very well. At least that’s what he thought. Maybe that’s why Mike loved listening to music so much. It didn’t require any skill, it didn’t require anything at all. Mike knew no one would have the nerve to call him a bad listener. Now that he had his headphones on the day has begun. He has a lot of acquaintances but his best friends come through the white skinny wire plugged into his pocket. His music choice was mainly inspired by the people he looked up to. Which isn’t very many people. Mike respects the most odd people, for the little things they do. He respects people for driving beat up cars and he admires those who wear the shirts from the father’s closets, he mainly looks up to those who don’t try and don’t realize their not trying. Mike loves people who don’t try to fit in, who say whatever is on their mind especially if it is completely random. Mike wants to be more random himself, he just doesn’t know how to go about it. He can tell the difference between those who are trying not to try and he hates that more than anything. Mike is an odd guy, most people wouldn’t know it though, maybe when he gets older people will understand, but probably not. He admires them from a distance. He doesn’t exactly know what kind of music these people listen to, but he figures they enjoy the same stuff. Mike keeps walking down the hall, now that his favorite song is on he completely forgets about how much he didn’t like Sam, he forgets about how funny Eddy was and the meaninglessness of Harry and Stephanie’s conversation. Mike is in his own world now and people understand him here. He doesn’t care about anyone else in the hall, he might as well be alone . . . he is alone. Mike loves this feeling. He feels like he is in a movie and the cameras are on him. He walks a little faster now that the snare is kicking in. People might have tried to talk to Mike but it didn’t really matter. Mike wasn’t there. He was in a movie and he was the star. Well, maybe not the star, but he was an essential character. Mike had friends, but he never saw them much. He couldn’t skip them or turn their volume down, he couldn’t replay them or turn them off, and he didn’t like not being in control. The end of the hall came quickly and Mike’s world got much bigger when he pushed through those double doors. Mike looked around at the trees and the clouds, he looked at the sun too, but not for long. It was a nice day, nicer than it had been all month and that made his favorite song so much better. Mike lived across the street and was in no rush to get home. Today he was so glad he walked because he wasn’t ready to turn off his song to get into the car. He walked home slower than usual that day, he loved that song and of course, he wasn’t in a rush to get anywhere. Michael Falls had a good day, things are better now. He’ll listen to the same song tomorrow.

Sonny's Blues

This story was one of my favorites that we have read. I really enjoyed the writing style of James Baldwin. He uses great detail in his writing to describe tangible and intangible things. My favorite part was at the end of the story when he was writing about Sonny and the boys playing. His word choice and analogies were really mind-blowing. As a fan of music myself, I could appreciate his writing more because I agreed with what he was saying. There is so much more to music than notes and chords and Baldwin expresses that with a poetic tone. A lot of people listen to music, but have no idea what the author is saying. For Sonny, he found freedom in his music, especially when people listened. “I understood, at last, that he could help us to be free if we would listen, that he would never be free until we did.” He mentions how the music was the only light in their world of darkness. Music is Sonny and the boys get away, it’s how they feel happiness, it’s what the Lord created them to do.

I always like reading the little bio the book provides on the author after I read the story. As I read I could tell that Baldwin spoke from experience and I could tell as I read he grew up in a similar scene. So I was not surprised to find out he grew up in Harlem and he was one of nine children. He mentions “When you have a lot of children you don’t always start running when one of them falls.” This is one example of many where Baldwin uses his own experiences to fill and embellish the story in a very real way. I think when we write, whether we admit it or not, we write from our experience. After all, it’s all we know…

The Imaginary Invalid

The Imaginary Invalid was quite a production. I have never been much a fan of theatre or musicals, but I do appreciate the talent and story behind them. Walking into the Bush Chapel I immediatley caught the feel of the play. I felt a bit creeped out, a little confused, and quite honestly I felt a little trippy. Needless to say these feelings remained throughout the play. The choreography was great, the makeup and costumes were stunning. I was amazed at the stage, actors and production of the play, but almost felt robbed by the plot and story. I really enjoyed the humor of the play, but did wonder which parts were appropriate to laugh at. I watched each scene with a hope of some clarity as to what exactly was going on. I found myself waiting for a climax or a breakthrough. When the play ended I was wondering what exactly I just watched and what the purpose of the story was. I was a bit distracted by all that was going on onstage and I missed some of the dialogue so I did a little more research on the story. I looked up a short summary of the play online and I realized I didn’t miss anything major, but I am still unaware of what exactly the author was trying to say. I caught a couple “deeper” lines about doing everything the doctors say will actually kill you, but is that really the point the writer was trying to make? Was there a bigger picture that I missed? It is possible that the author was trying to say something about marriage and how we choose our partners. But why the crazy costumes? Why the odd face painting? Was the entire play a dark comedy? It was an interesting and trippy couple of hours. I am still undecided whether I enjoyed it or not.

Blog...yea

Reading and writing. I’m going to blog about reading and writing. I mentioned it a bit in my last blog and in blogs previous but there is just something unique about the written word. Walt Whitman, C.S Lewis and many others have come to this same conclusion and used the power writing to touch millions of people. Thousands across the world have dedicated their lives to this thing called writing. It’s different than speech, it’s more profound than thought and deeper than intellect. I don’t know what it is about writing but it has power like nothing else. Writing has the power to last forever, or to be forgotten in seconds. The Lord chose power of the written word to reveal himself to us. He chose a book to retell the story of creation. He chose to write a book to tell humanity how to better know him. God knows the hidden, gentle, everlasting power of writing and so should I, so should we. John 1:1 tells us the “Word was God.” Whoa…this is huge. Have I missed something huge? Could it be that when I read the Word I am directly interacting with the Lord? There is so much more to the Word than we will ever know. I think that’s what’s great about writing. When C.S Lewis writes we may never know exactly how deep his words are. C.S Lewis himself may never know all that goes into his writing. That is what I love about writing. I think if humanity were to analyze any other book as much as they do the Bible there would be nothing left to learn from it. But because God is alive, His word is alive. We’ll never fully understand it, we’ll never stop learning. This well will never run dry.

I don’t consider myself a great writer, but I do appreciate good writing.

Bloggin Dirty

The blogging project is quite different. At the beginning it was a little bit exciting, and a little annoying, but mainly different. My feelings toward the blogging project remain the same. There are many different connections between the blogging project and class. It’s an intro to literature class, so we’re reading other people writing. We’re reading other authors stories, thoughts and ideas. This is exactly what our blogs are to us. I’ve never been much of a writer or a “journaler” so it’s nice to have some writing to call my own. I enjoy learning about what makes a good read and trying to apply that to my writing. I still don’t consider myself a writer, but I understand more the power of writing. Blogging does require me to dig deeper into the material. It requires that I reread the material. It forces me to find and explore the meanings and techniques of the writing. Blogging also gives me an avenue to relate the material back to the Lord and interact with all kinds of literature on a theological level, which I most likely would not do otherwise. This has worked O.K. for me. Honestly, I usually do the blogs rather last minute and admittingly I spend a lot more time on some than others. But it’s been a good experience. It’s great to have my thoughts written down so not only I but others can reflect on them as well. One of my favorite parts of the blogging project has been reading and interacting with my class mates and small groups writings. I am amazed every time I read their blogs. There is so much intellect and complexity to the people I spend time with everyday that I may never know. I think there is something about writing that pulls ourselves out of ourselves. It’s who we are…with words…kind of…

Walt Whitman

I enjoyed reading Walt Whitman’s poetry. I have never read any of his literature but I have heard a lot about him and know he is a very respected and well known poet. When reading When Lilacs Last in the Dooryard Bloom’d I really enjoyed what I understood, but there is still a lot I don’t understand about the poem even when I reread and analyzed it. My favorite lines in the poem were the lines where Whitman specifically talked about death. “In the day, in the night, to all, to each, Sooner or later delicate death” was one of my favorite lines. It reminds me of so many verses in Scripture. It is the main lesson in Ecclesiastes which is one of my favorite books. I think this statement is one of the most profound statements humanity can make. It’s the conclusion to all our stories here on earth. “They themselves were fully at rest, they suffer’d not, the living remained and suffer’d.” This quote is profound and simple. As the dead lay there they are finally at rest, but the leave all that remain uneasy. Knowing beforehand that the poem was about the death of Abraham Lincoln was very helpful when reading lines like “And what shall the pictures be that hang on the walls, to adorn the burial-house of him I love?” There were many lines and concepts that I didn’t understand as I read the poem though. I did not understand the “carol of the bird.” I also did not understand the mention of the hermit in the poem. Was that a reference to Abraham Lincoln? And why did he mention songs so much? Despite what I did not understand the poem was still able to touch and move me. I appreciate Walt Whitman for his well chosen words, passion and honesty in writing.

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Literature, Scripture

I really enjoyed yesterday’s discussion in class about reading Scripture as literature. Scripture is literature and should be read as so. Scripture was written as a story, some from oral traditions, some from first hand experiences and some were prophetic words straight from the Lord’s mouth. The authors wrote divinely, but with intentions to retell the story. Authors wanted to portray what happened or what will happen, just like in literature. The Word should be read as literature. We should be analyzing the stories, words and the writing styles while asking ourselves the moral of the story. I’m learning that learning how to read literature can be such a blessing to my spiritual life. If I learn how to read the stories and ask the right questions I may discover aspects of Scripture I would never notice otherwise. It is amazing how the Lord chose to tell his story through literature. The Lord chose to speak to all of creation through stories. When Jesus walked the earth he was constantly telling stories. He spoke mainly through parables. There is a power behind stories that unlike any other. I believe God wired humanity to be fascinated with stories and literature. When I think about it a lot of my daily activities involve some sort of literature. Worship songs and secular songs are poems that lend to emotional reactions and thought. Movies are stories retold with picture and sound. Literature is so important to the world and especially American culture whether we are willing to admit it or not.

As Christians, we are storytellers. We live to tell the story of the Cross.

"You yourselves are our letters of recommendation, written on your hearts, to be known and read by all men; and you show that you are a letter from Christ delivered by us, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts." (2 Corinthians 3:2-3,RSV)

Joel

Joel

I sometimes struggle reading the Old Testament. How do these stories apply to me? Aren’t we under a New Covenant? What could God be speaking through lists of names and complicated prophetic symbolism? Why would God want me to read these weird stories when I could go so much more out of Paul’s letters or the Gospels? I still don’t understand a lot of the Old Testament. When I read it I usually struggle through most of it. It is easy for me to pick out verses and chapters I can really get a lot from but it’s often a lot harder for me to understand the entire story. Reading Joel was a little different; I understood the prophetic word God gave Joel for the land of Judah. From what I understand it was fairly simple. Repent. Joel told the priests, farmers, men and women to weep and fear the judgment that is soon to come. God wanted the people to turn from their ways and mourn, and fast for Him. God promised the people He would bless them once again if they repented: Joel 2:27 "After all of this I will pour out my Spirit on all kinds of people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy. Your elderly will dream dreams; your young men will see prophetic visions. Even on male and female servants I will pour out my Spirit in those days." The previous verse is a promise from God about the last days. There is an apocalyptic tone to Joel's message. Joel mentioned plagues such as an army of locusts and famines as punishment for not returning to the Lord. Joel tells the people to repent, he warns them of the judgment and tells of a future to come where it will all be restored. Reading Joel’s word in its entirety helped me to understand the bigger picture of the book. I am excited to talk about this in class to see my classmates and Professor’s comments on the book of Joel.

The Living Breathing Word of God is Good.

Real Good

The Things They Carried

This was such an interesting story by Tim O’Brien. I was captivated by the story and the writing style. I read a bit of his biography after I finished the story and knowing he served in the army and won a Purple Heart adds a lot to the story. At first I was unsure of what the point of the story was going to be. Now that I am finished I am still unsure of what the ‘moral’ of the story is. He tells of how Mitchell Sanders cut off the dead boy’s thumb and carried it around because it had a moral. He fails to tell us what that moral is and I am still unsure. I think that was an insight into the bigger picture. The entire short story has a moral, I just don’t know what it is. At first I thought it was Love and Death, but the author introduced so many more themes. The lieutenant was obviously madly in love, and the characters faced death every day. But Tim O’Brien then focus’ on the imagination and how every man carried with them their ‘ghosts’ and Lt. Cross was never fully present due to his imagination. I love how the author gave so much detail about the tangible things they carried. Not only did it help the reader visualize the characters, but it showed what was important to them. Giving so much detail about the tangible things gave O’Brien a license to give detail about the intangible things they carried as well, i.e ‘guilt, fear, ghosts’. O’Brien did an excellent job of connecting the reader to the characters in a unique way. This short story really intrigued me and I want to read more from this author. I enjoy his writing style as well as his odd way of getting his feelings across to the reader.

A Grief Observed

"I thought I could describe a state; make a map of sorrow. Sorrow, however, turns out to be not a state but a process."

This is in the very begining of the last chapter of the book. C.S Lewis is reflecting on his previous writings, thoughts and feelings. He has such a unique mind and I believe only C.S Lewis himself could critique is thoughts so well. This sets the mood for the entire chapter. A chapter of reflection, honesty, and an overwhelming feeling of joy and peace. This chapter brings a solid conclusion to the book, and C.S Lewis' journey of grief. He leaves the reader feeling completed knowing God is in control. And he goes back to sort out the mess he made of the readers mind. (All the theological questions, all the doubts, all the fears and uncertainty.)

"The notes have been about myself, and about H., and about God. In that order. The order and the proportions exactly what they ought not to have been."

For a man of Lewis' stature to admit he was off base is revolutionary. His wisdom and humility is overwhelming. This is one of my favorite quotes from the book. I'm not sure why. I guess it's just great to read this after three chapters of alot of hopelessness.

"Thus up from the garden to the Gardener, from the sword to the Smith. To the life-giving Life and the Beauty that makes beautiful."

Much like the quote above this takes the attention of C.S Lewis, H. and the awkwardness and puts the focus back on God. The quote just makes me smile. This is was a great read.

His mind and clarity of thought makes me wish I knew myself better. C.S Lewis is one smart cookie and A Grief Observed is one great read.

C.S Lewis

C.S Lewis

C.S Lewis has been one of my favorite authors since I began reading. His writing encountered me at a crucial time in my life and God used them in a big way. My first encounter with C.S Lewis was with the Chronicles of Narnia. I got my first detention in 6^th grade and my dad handed me the 5 pound book and told me not to come out of my room until I read it all. After many hours of whining and a few minutes of reading I managed to find myself outside of those off-white walls. The talented author came back into my life a few years later. It was my senior year of high school and I was just finding who I was in the Lord when I began reading. When my father became a Christian he ordered a huge box of old books offline from a theology student long ago. The books contained nearly all of C.S Lewis writings. I started with Mere Christianity and was dumbfounded by every chapter. God spoke to me through his writing and taught me so much about thinking logically about the faith. I believe he was an author of infinite wisdom and I admire his passion for the Lord. I pick up Mere Christianity often and I am always lending it to friends trusting his writing will help them as much as it did me. His honesty, philosophy, testimony and thoughts forced me to admire his writing. I was influenced by ‘The Weight of Glory’ and a daily devotional with excerpts from all his writings. I have not read ‘A Grief Observed’ but I am anxious to get started. I am a bit familiar with the story behind the book and I am fascinated by circumstances surrounding his marriage.

Love and Death

Love and Death

At first I wasn’t sure about the style of the class or how much I would like it. It’s really growing on me. I love the different approach to learning and the connection I feel with the people in my group. Every day I know I am going to get the chance to hear how different people digested the reading from the night before and how right or wrong I am about the meaning of it. For me, the meaning of the class so far has been about the connecting and conversation with classmates about literature- mainly literature pertaining to love and death. It was during the last class that I realized exactly what Mr. Corrigan said in the first class “The two main topics of literature are love and death.” We have read some weird, intriguing, and bizarre stories about some interesting and odd characters but we have so much to learn from them all. All these authors (songwriters) have learned what we as Christians grow up being taught and spend most of our lives trying to figure out. The writer of Ecclesiastes tells of how everything our sinful nature desires is worthless because we all die. There are numerous cliché sayings I could insert here, but I’ll resist the urge. Our lives, when lived right, are focused on nothing but love. Love is one of the few things here on earth we can do that is eternal. We are all living for love whether we know it or not. Christians live to love God and people, while some live for love of drugs and money, some for sex and reading. No matter how we live of lives, or what we accomplish we all have the same fate. We’ll all end up dead and buried no matter what or who we love. But this life is temporary. The good news is we’re all eternal and that thought should change everything.

What We Talk About When We Talk About Love

Raymond Carver’s What We Talk About When We Talk About Love is a thought provoking short story attempting to answer or ask “What is love?” The entire story takes place around the kitchen table. The four main characters, or two couples, in the story are Mel and Terri and Nick and Laura. The story never gives us much detail about the characters but Carver gave the readers enough insight to understand where they are coming from. The characters in the story all come from different pasts and all have much different beliefs in love. Carver gives insights such as Mel went to seminary and that’s why he believed “spiritual love” is the only real love. Mel is the narrator of the story and much of the text is his opinion. He is a smart man who works as a cardiologist. He believed no one could really know what love is. He used marriage, divorce and death as examples. Carver represents several odd views in an attempt to define love. Mel’s wife Terri believed her ex loved her through physical abuse. While Nick and Laura are still in the honeymoon stage of their relationship their love is questioned by Mel since they have never gone through any hard times together. All the different views on the definition of love leave the reader feeling awkward and unsettled at the end of the story. The author ends with a silence that leaves the reader craving an answer. Carvers views and questions about love are expressed through this story. He uses the characters in unique ways to represent different beliefs in love.

Reading stories like these make me so glad I am a Christian. Without the Lord, life and love makes no sense at all. I believe love is sacrifice and commitment.

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My earliest memories of literature were the Hardy Brothers and the Book of Virtues. I got really into the Hardy Brothers mystery stories when I was young and my father always read the Book of Virtues to me. My most recent memories of literature fall mainly under the Christian Inspiriation umbrella. I love C.S Lewis' classics and the philosophical approach of G.K Chesterton. I read G.K Chesterton's book Orthodoxy at a crucial time in my spiritual journey and it played a big role in my life. Literature plays a monumental role in society. Literature is how people express themselves. It's an infusion of emotions, beliefs, stories and ideals that has limitless power.